Realization

I met this women, this intelligent, amazing, beautiful, and full of life women, and with this women i started a relationship. It started out so simple, girl likes girl, with fire in our eyes, love in our hearts, and each other always on our minds, it was wonderful, great, everything i wanted or so i thought.

Then i met her son again, and this time not as a friend of his mom's but his mom's new girlfriend, this was big for me I've never been with anyone who has kids, i was scared, i was nervous, i was intimidated, i was worried. I didn't know how to act, i didn't know what to say to a twelve year old boy that i have only met once before, i don't know what he likes to do, what he would think of me, and worst of all if he would be anything like i was when i was his age and my mom was dating, and if he was i was not prepared for that, not prepared at all.

Then i met her daughter, and her daughter i have met a few more times then her son, but still i had all those feelings rush through my mind and body again, but her daughter was an even bigger trick, her daughter is five, that's not the kicker though, it gets scarier her five year old red headed spit fire of a daughter has down syndrome, i have never been around a child with a mental disability and its overwhelming, it's terrifying. I didn't know what special things needed to be done with her, if treatment with her needed to be different, what she can or can't eat, can or can't do, i was lost and i was petrified.

Then i started getting to know her son more, and if me and his mother ever went out i was sure to make sure he was welcome to come, that was the biggest mistake the guys my mom dated when i was younger made they didn't invite me to go with ever, they wanted my mom all to themselves and that wasn't alright, she was my mom and they were taking away my time from her, so i vowed i would not make her son feel the same way, and he appreciated that very much. I told him as well right off the bat that though he had to respect me, and treat me as he would treat any adult that i was not there to be his parent, though he would have to listen to me i was not his mother or his father, i was simply there to just be his friend. We now have become so close, and we get along wonderfully, for the most part of course, there are always those ups and downs. He respects me and does what he is asked and we are just that we are friends which is what kind of relationship i want with him we have a very clear understanding that works for us both and its great.

Her daughter was another egg to crack, she is much younger then her brother and still looks at me as if i am taking her mother away from her, which isn't really the case but to any young girl who now has to share her mothers time with some new person in her life its understandable. She still doesn't like to follow any direction i give her, she likes to play the i heard what you said but i won't listen to what you are saying because i can and want to. It does get extremely frustrating at times but i know i just have to stay calm, and not get frustrated with her even though at times its extremely hard. She has grown attached to me a bit we do have our bonding times even though its not as often as i would like sometimes, and she normally pushes to have her mother do everything she isn't able to do, but most times she will give in and let me help her instead.

So in this new relationship i have had to learn about this new women who has been through so much in her life who has had her life turned upside down on her so many times and has had everything she had ripped away from her again and again, and who has even more then that pulled her life together, has been an amazing mother, a wonderful nanny, an outstanding friend, and has started a project for kids who have down syndrome all over the world. The project is called the T21 Traveling afghan, she crocheted one afghan  that was just to travel to her friends that she had met through the internet whom also had children with down syndrome, and it has turned into this huge project. For one week each family which is now up to two hundred and eleven families will have the traveling afghan and its journal and will take pictures of there child with down syndrome and they are all posted on the projects website. This is just amazing and it gets even bigger, this women donates her time to make any kid their own afghan, all it costs is the money for the yarn and shipping, she has made so many already and there are so many more to be made.  I have already gotten to know so much about her, and there is still so much to learn, but on top of having to make a relationship work with this unbelievable women, i also had to work on a relationship with her two kids. As scary as it all was, and still at times is, it is more then i expected, it isn't what i thought i wanted but i couldn't imagine life any differently.

As simple as it started, and as complicated as it got, Everything happens for a Reason and i'm happy with how everything worked out. I now have this amazing women as apart of my life, but i also have her two outstanding kids in my life as well.

I wouldn't change this for anything!!!

A-Rae