Mommy To Be

Obviously the baby was planned, but it was still definitely a surprise, we never expected it to happen so quickly but none the less were just as excited if not more that it has.

For me, this is my first child, my first baby, and my first experience with this entire thing, and i am so ready, it's just absolutely amazing, breath taking.

Each day we read in our baby journal about the progress of Stubby Chedda and each day i'm just amazed, it's so overwhelming, but so awesome.

I love this feeling and i'm ready to be apart of the mom world.

I didn't have two parents growing up, i had my mom, only my mom until i was nine, i don't want my child to ever not have both there parents planning large roles in there life, and that's why i knew when we started planning and started to try that this was right because i know that no matter what it is or what happens we will work it out and we will raise our children together. I'm so in love with her, and glad we have begun a big step of starting our lives together.

A-Rae

Just A Few Reasons

As you lay beside me, your arms wrapped tight around,
And as I drift fast asleep, to your breath so soft and sound!
As you hold me closely, as the tears run down my cheeks,
And as I slowly lose the pain, fore you make my body weak!

As you whisper gently, easing worries, and my fears,
And as you slowly touch my lips, pulling me close and near!
As you hold my hand, fingers perfectly intertwinned,
And as you talk me through things, soothing my worried mind!

As you laugh at my impressions, making ones up of your own,
And as you fully understand, all my sighs and moans!
As you understand me, as exotic, and extreme,
And you let me wonder all my goals and my dreams!

As you keep me stable, when i come so close to fall,
And as you keep me flying, soaring high and tall!
As you wave your hand to me, pinky, pointer, thumb,
And you stand with me for all the years to come!

As you feel against me, as close as we can be,
And as we spend our lives together, forever in love you see!
As I tell you every day, I am so in love with you,
I want to spend my life with you forever through and through!

This poem could keep on going, the list would never end
Fore every day is a new reason, my lover, partner and best Friend!

A-Rae

Yay Toast!!!

Valentine's Day!!!! A hallmark holiday like no other!

I loved it, it wasn't huge it was extravagant, but it was the best Valentine's Day I could have imagined (aside from not finding my heart shaped gobstoppers)!

We did a little of this, a little of that, got out shopping, went and looked at rings at our local jewelry stores, watched movies, crocheted, got our tarot cards read, and spent a lovely night together, with the wonderful bubba, and the very homolicious homo.

It was special because it was us, we were together, we made it special!

I couldn't be happier with whom i am spending the rest of my life with, she is my everything, my world, and my future!

No matter how hard life gets, it will always be worth it as long as she is by my side!

It was a lovely day, a lovely night, with a more then lovely pretty lady!

I LOVE YOU, PRETTY LADY!

A-RAE

Holding onto Nothing

Friendships come friendships go.

Is this easy, absolutely not.

How do you filter through the mess of good and bad?

You have to go with the flow and let what happens happen!

People take advantage and don't consider your feelings, they hurt you because of selfish decisions and choices they make, That is not a friendship, that is a user, someone who uses you to get what they want and when the time comes and you can no longer provide that ability to provide, then again this "friend" will walk away without a thought.

This SUCKS!

Mainly you have to hold your own, know when to say yeah sure no problem and when you have to finally just give up with it and say no, because your decision doesn't just effect you,it affects others around you, and given what they want it just encourages them to continue to do it because you do give in.

I am the first to say yes, but as soon as it crosses the line i will be the first to say no. I can hold my own, but i hate watching others being taken advantage of, it irritates me that people use others, i just think its ridiculous.

I have been irritable lately, but this is a big reason why, i have seen people getting taken advantage of lately and it saddens me.

Simple thoughts for the day!!

A-RAE

A New Year. . .A New Beginning

"Picture's never change, only the people in them do"

(Go participate in Take It Tuesday and post YOUR new beginnings photo! I just did!)

Each day is a new adventure, a new experience, hours and days unfolding!

Fearing the unknown, cherishing what you've got, holding on to the things that mean most!

New Years to me was never a time to start over, or the begininning, it was and is just a three hundred and sixty five day calendar started agian.

The fact is, is that my new beginning started July 1st, 2009 when me and CJ, first got together, when our relationship, when our lives, our future, our love, our family started, when we first began.

It's been rough, walking into something, into someones life, in which you know nothing about, to hope that you are everything, and more, for them, that you can succeed in being the person you want to be and the person they need, even though you have no idea what they want, what they need, there dreams, ideas, and beliefs.

It's been rough, but its been great! Learning, understanding, being apart of, communicating, helping, standing side by side, growing together, as a family.

I cherish what i have, sometimes like most it doesn't always show, and that is part of understanding.

To begin a family, with your love, your partner, your best friend is one of thee greatest things life can bring, and i am so unbelieveably lucky to have found thee one that not only i want to spend thee rest of my life with but the one that wants to spend hers with me as well!!! If that isn't the greatest beginning i don't know what is!



So Thank You baby, for being everything i could ever have wished for, and more!

I love you!!!!

I love you more then words could ever tell you!!!

A-RAE

Busy, Just Busy

This week is full, this week is packed.

To start me and CJ have to finish up the odds and ends of the fundraiser we are holding, TOMORROW, yes i said TOMORROW!

And after that, it leaves me two and a half days to practice for the drag show I am performing in, on Saturday!

There is not enough time for anything, and i am irritated which, let me tell you is wonderful, it really makes everything all the much more fun! ha ha!

Life is crazy, Life is good, Days are long, and nights to short!

Short and sweet!!!!!!

A-RAE

What sound does a horse make. . .

Oh the weather outside is. . .

Well it's not bad if you subtract thee ridiculous amount of snow that covers, well that covers everything.

So anyways, as me and my pretty lady were both relaxing on my no work day and her delayed work day, we were goofing around, singing and dancing. As she began to dance with me she started singing, ride the pony riding the horsey, ride the horsey.

At this point i'm cracking up laughing hysterically, as is she.

So as an even funnier joke i started dancing with her and started singing just what she had moments before, and as i sang ride the horsey, she started going nah nah nah like how a horse sounds, i could not hold it together . . . i busted a gut laughing hysterically at this, and i can definitely say the same for her!!!!